My year in review… Yea it’s stupid but what the heck

Sitting at my desk I thought I would just take a few minutes to look at the past year and do a bit of reflecting. I can tell you at the beginning of the year I was a bag of nerves, and to be honest on the verge of having a nervous break down, in the midst of a bitter breakup, and homeless. This year started with me breaking up with my ex girlfriend of a year and a half. I can tell you that I road that mother till it crashed and burned. I will go into further detail later on, but I didn’t start the year out on the best foot. One major blow was my former band breaking up and stiffing me with the bill for the practice space we had. To be honest I really wasn’t surprised by this, and it but into perspective who my friends really were. I was lucky because I didn’t become jaded, but embraced the fact that my intuition was right more often then not.

 

Leading up to the beginning of the year I had become somewhat of a heavy drinker, and packed on the pounds. This was largely due in part to my ex, who was a heavy drinker, and would get drunk and not leave the bed the next day. I can say that I was not much different and stayed in bed despite my better judgment. The homeless thing came in the form of me breaking up with my ex. I decided that I could no longer be in the same space as her, and I opted to sleep in my car then share a bed, or even a house with her. I’m not going to lie it was cold and not a bed by any means, but it was better the roller coaster I was on for the past few 8 months. Looking back at everything, I realized that I not once took time for myself, I never took 10 minutes and thought what would be good for me. Because of that simple fact I was a mess and I had poured all my emotion into a sinking ship, and into someone, who no matter what would not change.

 

I thought long and hard about this and decided it was time to think about myself. I got a place by myself, I started seeing a therapist, and started doing all the things that I hadn’t done for the past year. I read, I started to write again, and sing and play music. I got to know myself again. It was crazy, I began to see everything in another light. The year previous I was immersed in allot of negativity, and it reflected my outlook on the world, and personally I think really crippled me. It was during this time that I decided to date. To be honest I had never dated before, and I made an effort not to get serious, but just meet people and have fun. It served to really boost my self esteem and reversed my thinking about woman. In addition to this, it pushed me to get in better shape, and the weight I did gain, was taken off.

 

As the summer grew to a close I had my fun and decided it was time to take myself off the market, to be honest I am a one woman type of guy, and I had sown my oats so to speak. Also I began to jam with a cool group of guys, this, I felt, was the final piece to the puzzle for me. I was lucky enough to do a bit of writing for a press company, and was asked to write for a few shows around town. I invited a girl that I had met through a friend to the show with me. We had a few drinks and hot it off rather nicely. We talked and went on a few dates. Needless to say I was smitten, and we are still dating. I really want to say that the year climaxed toward the end. If I had the chance I would go back and do it again. The reason being, I learned allot about myself through my mistakes and hardships. I don’t blame anyone but myself for what happened, and I am glad it did. So as this year draws to a close, I can say that I have a different view on things, and dare I say, and a bit more mature and smarter from the experience. So for anyone who reads this, thank you for taking the time to do so, and I can guarantee this year I will write as much as I can, and give everyone a view into my life.

Santa is out….The 20 foot suited Unicorn is in!!

I am now old enough to know that the gifts I got when I was kid were from mom and not Santa, and when I would leave cookies out for Santa, they were most likely eaten by someone in my family who was older for me. Now the understanding that Santa doesn’t exist comes with age, and eventually the bombshell is dropped and the tradition is now passed on to the next generation. Though it’s a sad time, for most kids, the image of Santa and the holiday season still remains. But as I am becoming older I have noticed that the Christmas, or Holiday, season has become diluted. No longer are to have the image of a Jolly old fat man who spreads cheer to people. He has been reduced to a thinner more health conscious version of his former self. And in other parts of the world, ho,ho,ho is now ha,ha,ha. And truly the sadist part in all of this is something I witnessed a few days ago while I was shopping for my family. I was in the checkout line and an older lady paid for her items and said “Merry Christmas”. As she turned to leave, someone in line stopped the lady and told her that she should say Happy Holiday’s and found that what she said offensive.

 

Seeing this brought a black cloud to my day. I could tell the old lady was saddened as well. I did expect someone to say something, or at least stick up for the lady, but no one came to her rescue. I know your saying, “why not you”, but I did the same thing that everyone else did, nothing. I paid for my items and left the store. I drove home and headed strait to the internet, where I read several stories and people’s opinions on the Christmas Holiday season. Some people were fighting to stop a nativity scene from being set up in front of a church. And one person was removing her son from school because they were having a Christmas party and Santa was coming to pay the kids a visit. Now I am not saying that everything I read was negative, or viewed Christmas as an abomination, but really I do think things have changed. Living in America I get allot of different sides from allot of different people. It’s almost become the America way to fight literally everything and try to make everyone happy.

 

I took some time to think about Christmas and what it means to me now as an adult, compared to what it meant to me as a kid. As a kid I can remember it was that time of year that I got allot of gifts, got to eat a bunch of food, and cry Christmas day when my cousin would get more presents then me. It wasn’t all about the gifts, I actually bought into the Santa thing till I was about 8. I found out because my mom couldn’t hide presents worth crap, and it was obvious come Christmas Eve, when I wasn’t allowed in the guest bedroom something was up. As I became older, the gift thing became a request form rather then a wish list. But one thing we always did was hang Christmas lights and send everyone in our neighborhood a Christmas tin with cookies or fudge. Also in school we had a Christmas party and even recognized Hanukkah and Kwanzaa. Though all the black kids in my school didn’t celebrate or even know what Kwanzaa was.

 

I got a bright idea over the weekend to solve all the issues of Christmas and people getting offended over displays of religion or tradition. I figured that above all else people can equate Christmas or the holiday season with gifts, more importantly consumer goods, such as electronics and things to that effect. Now I figured that we need a symbol that is not going to offend anyone, or something a very slim group of people dislike. I thought long and hard, and came to the conclusion that a Unicorn would be a good choice for the new symbol of the holidays. Now a Unicorn is boring so I figured he would need to be 20 feet tall, and wearing a business suit. Now I don’t know why I thought he should be wearing a suit and be 20 feet tall, I just thought since we are going to keep it in the realm of fantasy, why not spice the symbol up a bit. Now to top it off this 20 foot Unicorn in a business suit will be caring a cannon that shoots said consumer goods out of it. Because when it comes down to it, we don’t have time to break everyone up into groups and celebrate each person’s traditions or believes. So why not just celebrate material goods.

 

I figure this way we won’t offend anyone or any specific group of people. And really I haven’t met a person that would look down on accepting an iPod shuffle from the Unicorn gift giver. Now I think we could work the title a bit, but I think this is the best course of action. Now I know some people will get offended about the fact that we are doing away will all differences and traditions and cultural beliefs, but really this is America and that is what we thrive on. I figure if you want to live by your own traditions or celebrate the traditions of your given religion, I say move back to the country of your origin, or where your beliefs are written law. That may sound offensive to some, but really if I’m willing to give up my traditions to make everyone happy then they have to too. And really it’s only something that we have to do for 1 day a year. The rest of the 364 days we can do whatever the hell we want and be pissed off and whatever stupid belief or tradition someone has. So to everyone from me, Happy consumer Unicorn day!!